Relationship Advice - Love is Esteem For Self and Others (Part 2 in Love Workshop Series)

Love is Esteem for Self and Others

Love is an expression and assertion of self-esteem. –Ayn Rand

You may have heard it said that you can't love others if you can't love yourself. Having self-love means you care about and like yourself in a healthy and balanced way. It means you have self-respect and believe you are worthy of love.

When someone lacks self-love, it indicates that they have a low self-esteem. They do not esteem or value themselves as highly as they ought to. They might not really believe they are loveable. And the more they dislike themselves, the more hindered they become in receiving love from others. As a result, they are unable to love others as deeply as they would want to.

It is important to note that what appears as excessive self-love in some people also indicates a poor self-esteem. These individuals come across as arrogant and boastful. However, they yearn for admiration in hopes that it will satisfy their desperate longing for genuine love.

Loving and esteeming others fully begins with loving and esteeming yourself in an appropriate and healthy way.

When you:

• Allow for mistakes and forgive your flaws

• Are patient and understanding with yourself

• Are not self-deprecating or self-exalting

• Satisfied with your best effort

• Believe in yourself and don't give up

• Acknowledge your good qualities and strengths and accept your weaknesses

• Learn to like and appreciate who you are

Then, you will be much better able to do so for others. Love, respect, and appreciation will transfer to all other areas and relationships in your life.

The way you esteem yourself will be directly related to the way you esteem others. That is why a positive self-esteem is an important part of our experience of love. Self-esteem can be built and improved as you acknowledge and receive love in your life and as you love yourself and others as best as you can. In its own miraculous way love increases in our lives as we give it away. The more we give, the more we have to give. So you can start right where you are no matter how little you may feel you have to give. There is so much more love for you to experience.

REFLECTION

• Explain what esteeming yourself means to you and how you think it relates to loving others.

• How can a low self-esteem make it difficult to receive love and to love others?

• Review the list of examples of loving and esteeming yourself. How do they apply to you?

• Is self-love lacking or excessive in your life? How can you bring it into balance?

• Think about the way you feel about yourself. In what ways is it helping or hindering you from loving others?

EMPOWERING THOUGHTS & AFFIRMATIONS…

Everyone wants to be loved. Everyone is worthy of love.

I can allow the power of love to work in my life. I can accept myself and others as worthy of love.

For complete Love Workshop series, go to http://behappy4life.com/lovingothers.html

Krystal Kuehn, MA, LPC, LLP, NCC is a licensed professional counselor, author, teacher, and musician. She specializes in helping people live their best life now, reach their full potential, overcome barriers, heal from their past, and develop a lifestyle of health, happiness, and love. Krystal is the cofounder of New Day Counseling, a marriage and family counseling center and BeHappy4Life.com, an award-winning self-improvement and personal growth site where you can find hundreds of free resources, online workshops, video presentations, insights, and inspiration.